Home
i'll be ok.   
08:23pm 10/09/2003
  yes i am back in school now and no i don't update my journal ever...it's been fun in school so far. i'm really glad that i am able to see all my good friends again. there is only one thing that has had me down since i've been here...and that is losing allison...i love her so much...and i miss her dearly. i adore allison and she was good for me...and i think i was good for her too...i'm usually not this open about my emotions so i don't even know if i'm going to put this in my livejournal...maybe i will just type it and then just X out this whole window...i have alot of emotions running through me right now...i'll be ok it's just going to take a while for me to, as much as i hate to say it, get over this...but i will smile and be happy because that's just what i usually do...usually few people know when i am truely feeling sad...but i guess everyone does now...but i'll be ok, if allison is happy...and my friends are happy...then i am happy. i just want people to be happy because that's what makes me happy. if i keep saying the word "happy" then it will lose all meaning and i don't want that so i will stop now...  
     Read 4 - Post
 
it's that time of the year.   
09:43pm 22/08/2003
  well...i go back to school in just over a week. i'm excited to go back and see all my friends again. plus i'm going to have jon and dave as my roomies and that's just going to be so damn awesome. we can jam all the time and i'm sure that we will. i am also excited for all the things that we do like brown bag bingo and...well..i'm sure there's more...oh ya, and also i'm going to have my car there this year and i'm sure some more of my friends will have their cars aswell. that's going to make it easier to get off campus every once in a while. well i really i have pee right now so i'm going ot go do that but i will see you all soon. note: i have metioned peeing in my last two journal entries.......ok, i really have to go now, bye bye.  
     Read 5 - Post
 
hello friends.   
11:17pm 05/07/2003
  wow, i haven't updated my livejournal in a while. i'm sorry about that. hopefully people still look at this thing...if not...i guess you are the only one...umm...thanks for that... anyway, i saw T3 today with my dad. it was really good i thought. it started off a lot like T2 but the ending was totally different. i'm getting a cd player for my car tomorrow. it's an alpine, that's a really good brand of car radios and speakers. i've been playing my guitar alot more lately. i've been really itchin' to crank my new amp and stuff. i haven't really done that yet...well not with a drummer at least...ya...oh ya! i almost forgot, i'm going to see further seems forever on july 12th. i can hardly wait. when i remember that i'm going i get really excited and my stomach feels like i'm on a rollercoaster and it makes me have to pee...i really wish i didn't just say that...see, that's what happens when i get excited, i say stuff that i probably shouldn't be sharing with people. oh ya, and also i'm going to be a pallbearer on monday and i need a haircut soon...so that basically catches you up with everything. ok then, bye bye for now.  
     Read 2 - Post
 
holla back.   
11:13pm 22/05/2003
  yo yo, this thug needs a hug. who wants it?

getting cuddly with a red body pillow.

i want to see the new terminator movie.

missing people i want to see...missing people i've never seen..

on a really cold day...hell is heaven...

sore throat.

pee time... ...ok, i'm back.

hey, i peed...where's MY crown and sash and kiss...i guess only cute girls get that.

speaking of peeing....i'm thristy....

ya, i drink my pee....oh, you didn't know?

nah, just kiddin'....or am i?....yes..yes i am...

argh....did i mention sore thoart?

...random stuff...aaaaaaand i'm spent.		  
     Read 3 - Post
 
home sweet boredom   
11:07pm 15/05/2003
  i'm home now...so..ya...it's boring here right now. i will hopefully be getting my car back soon. hey, there is a full lunar eclipse tonite. that's when the moon, earth, and sun perfectly line up blocking the sun light from reflecting off the moon cause that's what makes the moon glow bright...it's not glow in a dark like i used to think. i found my awesome kite today. it's a teddy bear one. i've had it since i was a little kid :p  
     Read 1 - Post
 
it's amazing how much one person can hurt.   
01:55pm 12/05/2003
  signs that i hurt:

-i can't smile no matter what.
-i don't blink nearly as much as normal.
-my hands shake.
-i pace without stopping.
-i am physically sick to my stomach.
-i can't stop thinking.
-i can't stop hating myself.
-i can't stop wanting to cry.
-i'm always about to cry but i don't.
-i'm like i am right now.		  
     Read 2 - Post
 
and then there was one...   
03:17pm 11/05/2003
  ...well...i just helped billy move out...and my roomies, jon and justin, have been gone since friday. now it's just me here. i feel like i'm the only kid in the whole building. i kind of feel like that kid in the shining. all these empty rooms in this big empty building. who knows what went on in those rooms all year...and if i find someone who does know then i don't want him/her telling me...that's for sure. well, i'm here till tuesday. i still have matt but he's in a different building. he leaves tomorrow. i hope to hang out with him alot this summer along with the rest of the gang from good ol' palmer a.k.a. "crap town USA". i can't wait to get my car back and drive again. i want to feel the the freedom. i haven't driven since move in day. all in all i think it's going to be a good summer...i really want to keep in touch with my friends from wsc...a lot of them are from eastern mass but i have plenty of good reasons to go to eastern mass this summer...i really want to see allie...i really like her alot...i hope that she likes me too...i hope that we can be good for each other...i hope that she will still laugh at my lame jokes...i hope the quabbin is as nice as i imagine it...i hope...  
     Read 1 - Post
 
sooooore as helllll.   
10:07pm 19/04/2003
  well, after getting about 3 1/2 hours of sleep last night (i know i know, it's my own fault) i woke and my dad picked me up to bring me to the nursing home that my mom works at (lifecare center in Wilbraham) for my volenteer work that i do every year for easter. every year, the day before easter the nursing home has a bunch little kids, whether they be sons and daughters of the nursing staff or grandchildren of the residents or even just people that would like to bring their children, and they are an easter egg hunt. i've been doing this for the last three or so years. it's really fun. i get to hind the eggs, do face paints for the kids, and also help them colour some hard-boiled eggs. after that my mom, my aunt, my cousin, and i all went to some stores and out to lunch. then i came home and not even an hour after being home this lady, Anette, calls for me. she is usually calling me to do yard work for her and stuff..i live in a trailor park, it's kind of a retirement park and there are alot of retired old people here that can't do stuff like yard work because of ne thing or another, i'm kind of the handy man around the park, anytime anyone needs some yard work done or something they call me..so anyway, Anette wanted me to come and rake her yard today. so a few minutes after the call i walked to her house, rake in hand. i showed up and began my task...i raked...mulched...and bagged the leaves in her yard...all by myself...for FOUR HOURS! i didn't finish until 8:20pm...i was filthy and so i hopped in the shower quickly...although it was hard to wash being so sore and tired...and now here i sit...my body aching...my arms sore...my hands blistered..(typing sucks right now)...my back so so so sore...so sore that i am in alot of pain just sitting...and my eyes half open...the screen just got a little more blurry...if i had the choice right now between a 2003 corvette or a nice long back massage...i'd take the massage...or actually...i'd take the corvette and use it to pick up chicks to give me a back massage...nah, too much work...i'll just take the massage...anyway...i'm so damn tired...and i'm home by the way...ok, i'm sleepy ryan now, nighty night and sweet dreams to you...  
     Read 1 - Post
 
it's hella nice out today.   
02:11pm 12/04/2003
  it's wicked nice out. i'm wearing shorts for the first time this year. matt made a good call with frisbee on the green today. this school year is winding down quickly. i can't believe that my freshman year in college is almost over. it went by so fast. i'm really looking forward to the summer, seeing people i graduated with and such. i'm really looking forward to catching up on what's been going on in palmer, formally known as "crap town". jay is coming up to wsc today, that should be fun. he always has something up his sleeve and i always have some kind of adventure when i hang out with him. so anyways, i'm in a good mood and i'm not going to lie to you, the weather has a lot to do with it. the weather seems to reflective of everyones moods lately so i'm glad it's a hella nice day out today....oh ya, nate's here!!!  
     Read 1 - Post
 
none.   
12:59pm 05/04/2003
  i hate drama...ugh...i was sooo tired last night. my life is so uneventful on the weekends. i need to do something...oh ya...i'm going to see jesus christ superstar today. it's one of the plays that wsc is putting on this year...i've heard good about it actually...oooo, it's starts in an hour...i'd better leave soon to get the best seats...be careful ryan, that's why you left early to the last bingo night and you ended up spliting you head open but i don't suppose that i would have such luck while going to sit through jesus christ superstar...but i'm not going to judge, like i said, i've heard good about it so...ok bye.  
     Read 1 - Post
 
i was sad last night..   
06:01pm 03/04/2003
  last night i was sad because two people said good night to me and then signed off before i could say good night to them...i felt sad because they left before i even got the chance to say it to them... :( ...ugh...i feel sad because sometimes i feel like people don't like me...or maybe i just like people too much...not "like like" but i just really enjoy making new friends and meeting new people and stuff and i really like when people enjoy my company aswell...i dunno...

p.s. i wish i was inside my sam's choice water tornado...but all i can do it watch it..		  
     Read 3 - Post
 
got my staples out.   
12:09am 01/04/2003
  ya, so i got my staples out. it didn't hurt that much. i asked the nurse and she let me keep the staples. she thinks i'm weird now but who cares? i'll never see her again *fingers crossed*.  
     Read 2 - Post
 
staple story   
04:13am 31/03/2003
  woo hoo, i have a live journal now... ya..so this weekend has been quite unproductive to say the least...i get my staples out monday so i'm pretty excited about that. oh ya, my staple story, here goes: it wasn't last friday but the friday before. we were getting ready to go to bingo night here at my campus. i was quite excited about it as i usually am considering that they only have it once a month. it starts at 11pm but we decided to leave at 10:30 to get good seats because it's usually a pretty good turn out. so anyway, we left my room on the floor and went down the first floor to exit the building because bingo is held in a different building. we were all walking down the stairs fast because of the excitement over bingo. i was really excited and so i decided that i would try to be cool and jump off the steps and land on the floor because i do that sometimes. so i proceeded to jump off the third to last step before the first floor began. i did not realize, however, that the ceiling for the first floor started really low and there an edge no very high above where i was jumping. sure enough just as soon as i jumped a smashed the top of my head on the edge and fell to the floor on my bum. everyone immediatly turned around and i quickly got up. i was feeling a little embarrased but no pain. so i said something to the affect of "well, that sucked, ok lets go to bingo". sure enough there was a campus security guard there and he saw it and he, of course, asked "sir, are you ok?" and i said "ya, i'm fine". just then....blood starting pooring down my forehead and the officer then said "my god sir, you are blooding!". so i put my hands to my forehead and took them down...yup...they were covered in blood. he immediatly rushed me to a chair and got me some paper towels to hold on my head, which was bleeding profusely mind you. then he proceeded to call another campus security guy over with a cruiser to drive me to noble hospital with is just down the street. now, throughout this whole thing i didn't really feel much pain, i don't know if it's because head injuries don't hurt or it's just because i'm a tough guy...this question troubles me because both don't make too much sense. so, jon came with me to the hospital and when we got there we both went to the front desk to sign in or whatever...the last time i was a patient in a hospital was when i was born so i didn't know that procedure that well. we went to the front desk there and i was still holding the paper towels on my head feeling like an idiot. this woman at the desk was asking me this questions....for 20 minutes she interrogated me with this quiz from hell! i had to sign my name about 500 times while holding paper towels to my BLEEDING HEAD! now this whole time, like i said, i wasn't feeling much pain so i tried to keep my humor about me as i usually try to do in situations like this. so about 15 minutes into the questions i just asked the receptionist in a stern but humorous tone, "can i ask you a question?...has anyone ever died right here just answering these quesions??", she just laughed a little and said no, and i replied "oh, that's good then". so anyway, i got done with that then me and jon sat in the waiting room (people looking at me holding the paper towels to my head...feeling like an idiot). so we waited for a couple minutes then we were called in by a nurse and she sat me down and questioned me again! she also took my blood pressure and temperature and stuff. then finally was brought into a room. jon came with me into the room, he sat in the corner. i layed on the bed thingy there and we both waited for the nurse to come in. the nurse was like a 50 year old guy...he looked at my head and cleaned the injury area and stuff like take. i tried to joke with him a little but he didn't seem to be havin' it. he didn't even crack a smile but oh well. then the doctor came in. he was really chill. i liked him right off the bat. he made some small talk and asked me what i want to do when i get out of college and stuff like that. i joked with him a little, he dug it. haha, in fact, i'm really proud of this joke. i asked the doctor a serious yet comically dramaic voice, "doc, i have a question for you", doc replied, "what is it?", i then said in an even more dramaitc tone "will i ever be able to play bingo again doc?..." doc then laughed a bit and said "of course you will"...so ya...that was funny...anyway, then he shot some novocain in my head. now i didn't see it because the injury is on top of my head but jon did and he said that it was probably the biggest needle that he had ever seen in his life. it didn't hurt though. then he said that he was going to just put some staples in my head. that went pretty well, he put three in, i felt the staples actually go in too but it didn't hurt, i just felt them go in. so after i got them in the doctor sat me up and the nurse came back in and gave me a paper that says how to take care of my head injury and some ointment too...then me and jon got picked up by the campus sercurity and we were brought back to our building...then i went back up to my room and i sat there and put an ice pack on my head like my mom said to to stop the swelling. needless to say...i didn't get to play bingo that night like i was all excited to. :( but after bingo all my friends came up and asked me how i was doing, that made me feel quite special. so that was ten days ago...and i get them out today...yay...  
     Read 1 - Post
 
 
wheneyestalk
 
 

Advertisement